Moroccan Chicken with Chickpeas

Ok, so yesterday I came to a realization.  I’m chubby.  I might even be fat.  Ugh, fat.  It hurts writing that.  As if putting it down in words somehow materializes something that otherwise would not exist.  Unfortunately, that isn’t how it works.  My body is squishy regardless if I acknowledge it on this blog.

Now for someone who has seen me since I’ve pushed out my babies, this shouldn’t be news.  If anything, confusing on how I have gone for over a year since the birth of my youngest son and I am only now just realizing that I am a chubby girl.  But honestly, for the last year I am lived completely oblivious to this reality.  My lack of awareness of my own body size is the result of many factors.  But really, it can be boiled down to one single truth.

I suffer from a high self-esteem.  Much like my mother, I live my life with complete confidence in myself.  For the majority of my life, I have been blindly self-assured of who I am as an individual, appearance and all.  And frankly, it has served me well.  As a whole, I am almost always happy with my life because I am largely confident in my life choices.  I’ve gotten job offers, made friends, found stylish clothes that fit.  When I was single, I never had an issue getting a date.  Overall, if I really wanted it, I would will it to happen.

So after having my baby boys, sure, many of my clothes still didn’t fit.  But that didn’t mean I was chubby.  My hips have shifted.  Or I am not that far off from where I was (oh I am).  Because in my head, I wasn’t overweight (oh I am).  I was in complete denial.

This isn’t the first time my body imagine has not matched reality.  When I went to college, as a quintessential overachiever, I gained 30 pounds.

Yet, I remained as confident as ever.  I went through three full years of undergrad before I actually realized that I was chubby and needed to rethink my habits. I won’t forget the day it hit me.  I was sitting in a class, talking to a girl who lived in my dorm who was friends with my roommate.  She was telling me a story about someone.  Or trying to see if I knew someone.  That part of the story has faded.  But the rest of our conversation, I can close my eyes and find myself sitting in that classroom.  There were no desks, and the plastic chairs made a giant circle outlining the room.  It was right before class as we made what I had amounted to nothing more than small talk.  She began describing this girl she was talking about to me.

“She is a little bit of a bigger girl. You know, like you.”

Those words stung.  In that moment, I wanted to cry and run out of the classroom.   I replayed her words over and over in my head on my walk back to my room after class.  I had to get them out of my head.  So I joined Weight Watchers. lost the weight, and got myself down to 128 pounds.  I was fit, healthy, and happy.

This time, she hasn’t been around to bring me back to reality.  So I am not sure what happened to snap me out of it.  But yesterday, I realized that maybe I was a bit farther away from my pre-baby weight than I’d like, and I need to kick it into gear if I want to feel confident in my skin by summer (and more importantly, my Italian vacation with my husband).

So I am embarking on the 8 week total body challenge on the Strive with Megan app.  It includes a daily 22-28 minute workout and a meal plan.  It’ll be tough.  Mostly because Matt loves snacking and I love to be part of the party 😉 But I’ve done it before.  So it’ll happen again.

We tried one of the meals from the 8 week meal plan, and it was delicious! I tweaked it a bit to make it our own, including adding rice because otherwise Matt would have claimed there was just not enough food.  It was simple to make, and the ingredients are mostly items that you would find in your kitchen on any day.  Matt put this on his: make again list.

[ps: I don’t plan to share other variations of the meals from the Strive app but I encourage you to get the app yourself!]

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Italian Sausage Stuffed Eggplant

When it comes to holidays, I love the ones that aren’t hyper commercialized. So yes, that means I LOVE April Fools Day.  Playing tricks on people is something I live for.  And no, I do not need a holiday for that.  But when our nation decides to celebrate it–yeah, sure. I’m in.

My co-worker Amber and I spent our April Fools Day playing tricks on our co-workers.  Sure, it was fun switching our boss’s diet coke for lemon juice and creamer.  But it only made my thirst for mayhem stronger.  I needed more.

So, this year I decide that Matt would be the perfect target for a fake cake.  I told Matt that I made him his favorite cake–a black forest cake.

black forest cake...or is it....
black forest cake…or is it….

But in reality, I took a balloon–blew it up and covered it with homemade icing.  Matt was psyched that I made him a cake out of the blue.  I gave him a knife and asked him to cut us both a piece of cake.  And then….bam!  The “cake” exploded in his face and icing went everywhere.  It was awesome.  I laughed hysterically, and Matt looked at me and said, “So, there is no cake?” And that was the best part.  He was all excited for cake.  And there none. Bahahaa.

 

my victim. bahahah
my victim. bahahah

All and all, it was a good April Fools Day.  Messing with our co-workers with Amber was fun.  Messing with Matt only made the day better. And really, what is was was a reminder that there is no need to take life so seriously.  Sure, I definitely get stressed.  I have mini-panic attacks at work over nothing.  I freak out over little things.  But at the end of the day, I need to remind myself that I need to just laugh it all off.  And that’s why I love April Fools Day.

Besides making an exploding cake, I made this delicious eggplant dish! I watched this Italian tv show with my father-in-law and memorized the ingredients as well as I could.  This recipe is easy to make and delicious to eat.  Try it.  You will thank me.

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Buffalo Meatballs

Wow. Has it really been that long? Since my last post, we celebrated a new years, a birthday, and a month of working far over 200 hours.  To say the least, it’s been busy.  And yet, despite early mornings, late nights, and not enough sleep, I have no complaints.  January kicked ass.

starting out 2013 on the right foot.

First, January is my birthday month.  I never say no to a reason for a themed-party so this year my birthday party was Prom.  Complete with a cheesy background and spiked punch, we slow danced, played beer pong, and slammed shots. One of the greatest parts was my actual prom date from my junior prom came–so I was wearing the same dress, the same jewelry, same shoes, same tiara, and the same date. We had to reenactment our prom photo.  That and a bunch of friends that were willing to dress up with me in prom dresses, suits, and tuxes and just let loose, get drunk, and play some beer pong until 4 in the morning.  It was the perfect birthday celebration.

prom
the husband and my prom photo.

And well, with working and planning a prom, not much time was left for cooking.  So we survived on salads, pasta, and cereal.  No new recipes.  No grocery shopping–seriously–we didn’t go grocery shopping for a month!  But now it’s February.  And while work hasn’t slowed down, my party planning has so I finally have some time to try out some new recipes.  And I have missed it!

Since this weekend was the Superbowl, I decided to make a healthier version of buffalo wings–buffalo meatballs made with ground turkey.  It was delicious, easy to make, and no where near as messy as wings.  Hopefully you all will enjoy it as much as we did!

 Buffalo Meatballs

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Taco Flatbread Pizza

I am starting my second round of p90x.  And this time my focus is on nutrition.  Which is particularly challenging during this holiday season.  But so far so good!  Especially with delicious meals like this taco flatbread pizza!

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For me, the hardest part of eating healthy is not living alone.  When I lived by myself in law school, healthy eating was never an issue.  I controlled what food was in my fridge and what cluttered my cupboards.  Now as husband and wife, grocery shopping is a team sport.  Since Matt is a woodworker, he is all about the snack food that’s easy and fast to eat–which basically means unhealthy (but delicious) food that is rather hard to resist.

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So finding meals that are healthy but still have that snack-like taste can be difficult.  This taco flatbread pizza was an excellent compromise–full of protein, little bit of veggies, and still falls into the pizza family so both Matt and I were happy.  This has definitely made it into our recipe rotation.

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Skinny Taco Dip

Ok. Truth time.  I do not like the movie Elf.  I find no redeeming qualities in the movie, irrespective of the reality that I love Zooey Dechanell.  The movie is just not funny.  There. It’s out there.  Just had to get that off my chest.  BUT even though I will not spend my Christmas season watching Elf doesn’t mean I’m not excited for winter because…

It’s party season!! And this girl LOVES parties.  Eggnog. Christmas cookies. Ugly Sweaters. Love Actually (now that’s a movie!).  Wow, my heart is fluttering as I type this.

With all these parties, it’s likely that you’ll get an invite to a party where you need to bring something.  Here is a great taco dip recipe that is SUPER easy and CRAZY delicious.  Million gustas.

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Sesame Encrusted Baked Chicken

I finally have joined the rest of the world–I own a smart phone!  After years of free phones that can hardly text, my phone is fully functional, complete with GPS and Words with Friends.  But the best part of having a smartphone is the camera!  For the past couple of years, I’ve had to bug Matt for his phone whenever the urge for a photoshoot struck.  Now I can whip out my own phone without the hassle of convincing Matt to fork over his.

My last recipe required so much prep work and cooking time.  This recipe is much more worker-friendly.  The ingredients are all ones that you can normally find in your cupboard.  It was a simple, yummy meal that I recommend on those busy nights.

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Eggplant Parmigiana

Fall is finally here!!  It is my favorite season–cool, crisp weather, sweaters, scarves, boots, pumpkin lattes.  Usually fall marks new beginnings for me since a new year of school starts–but this year is the first year in 20 years that I didn’t start school.  Luckily, the great feeling of a fresh start didn’t fade this fall because I started my first, real job as a lawyer a couple weeks ago.  Still, it’s odd not working on homework or spending time on OneNote.

Fall also means more heartier meals.  Something to stick to your ribs.  And this makes me think of eggplants.  I always avoid recipes that require deep frying so making eggplant parmesan has never been something on my to-do list.   Thank God I found this recipe! I still get to enjoy eggplant parmesan without all the deep fried hassle and high calories.

 

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Layered Feta and Eggplant Zucchini Dish

So many new things have been happening in my house.  I got a job!!  Only after a couple months after graduating law school, I got a position as an associate attorney at a law firm that specializes in banking and business law.  I started last week and so far I am loving it!  The firm has been so welcoming.  It feels like I hit the jackpot.

Waving Matt good-bye on my first day of work.

And the day after starting work, Matt and I decided it was time to paint our kitchen cabinets.  We’ve only had our house for a little over a year, and it definitely falls under the category of a “fixer-uper.”  The kitchen had cheap, dark, wood cabinets.  They added nothing to our kitchen.  My mother-in-law suggested we paint them, and it was time for us to take her advice.

before.

Still putting last minute touches on the newly, painted cabinets.  So no “after” picture yet.  With the new job and a diy project turning my kitchen upside down, cooking fell to the back burner. But after a week hiatus, it was time for a new recipe.

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Cheesy Zucchini Bake

While I was studying for the bar, I wanted fast and easy homemade meals.  Our freezer was full of ground turkey so I decided to cook it up, mix it together with pasta, cheese, and herbs and turn it into a bake.  Matt feel in love with the meal, begging me to remake it.  So after making various versions of the pasta bake, I decided it was time for a vegetarian bake.

Our fridge is becoming increasingly more full of fresh veggies from our garden every day so I cut up our multi-colored zucchinis, some basil, green onions, and jalapenos, mix them with some cheese, spinach, and dried herbs. and the cheesy zucchini bake was born!

isn’t this tomato cool! it’s a striped tomato.
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Orange Bell Pepper and Basil Bruschetta

Today was harvest day at the Cremona house.  With my handy shears, I plopped tomatoes, cucumbers, jalapenos, serranos, green beans, and an orange pepper into my basket.  When I was done, I looked like I raided a farmer’s market.

I am so proud of my orange bell pepper.  Last year only my green peppers grew so I was thrilled when this year turned out to be different.  I didn’t want my miracle pepper to go to waste.  This pepper needed to be used in a truly fun recipe.  Something unique where the flavors of the pepper stood out.

my orange pepper in its natural habitat.
Matt arrange them like this, claiming they were on a cucumber sled.

This twist on the traditional, tomato-based bruschetta was excellent.  The orange pepper makes the bruschetta sweeter and crunchier.  Next time I make this I think I’ll use different color bell peppers to see how that mixes up the taste.

 

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